Uggghhh! Moooom, it's soooo unfair! All my friends have iPhones and I'm the only one who doesn't! It's like, I'm literally the only person in the whole world without one. I feel like such a loser.
I don't understand why you won't buy me one. You're always saying how much you love me and want me to be happy, but clearly that's not true because if it was, you'd get me an iPhone. It's not like I'm asking for a million dollars or something (although, let's be real, an iPhone is basically the same thing).